Oleta's Page

Minister, Teacher, Shamanic Practitioner and Reiki Master

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One of the most useful things I learned in college was that there are two kinds of stress (the body’s response to life’s taxing demands): eustress, coined by Dr. Hans Selye, and distress.Eustress or ‘good’ stress is motivating while distress is immobilizing. Eustress can quickly become distress or vise-versa, and we have a choice as to which one we will allow to have control.

The past year has found me taking care of and moving my parents both of whom are having memory problems. Needless to say there are multitudes of decisions and responsibilities. While eustress was my companion allowing me to get a lot done, distress was always looking over my shoulder and at times I must admit I succumbed to it. I would find myself overwhelmed and curled in fetal position sobbing my woes. I felt angry and sorry for myself being in the situation, and helpless to stop the changes I witnessed in my parents. At those times I remembered a synonym for distress is grief.

After a good cry, I would ask, “What’s one thing I can do to get me moving?”

Something as small as getting my mom a cup of coffee would uncurl my body and get me moving again. I’m grateful for my understanding of both types stress, and knowing I can choose which one I will allow.

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Learning From Anger

I have found, for myself, that being angry is easy. I have learned that anger generally masks a fear of some sort. When I can look into myself and ask, “What about XYZ caused me to so passionately react,” I’m often surprised.

I became aware that when I defend my anger with with, “well, he/she/they…,” I’m deflecting. When I point a finger at someone, someplace, or something and say, “That’s the wrong,” I’m projecting.

I’ve discovered that when certain negative occurrences become a pattern, I need to pay attention and ask ‘why does this happen? What am I not seeing?’  It may take awhile because I’m stubborn, but when I do recognize what I need to learn about me, and it’s usually a belief I didn’t realize I had, the pattern ceases to exist in my life.

If I want to stop getting angry about whatever, I need to find the true reason for the anger inside myself and let it go. Only then will my world change.

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Music and Memories

My husband and I just left a The Big Room at Sierra Nevada Brewery where Paul Thorn performed. As I sat watching this fantastic performance, I was reminded of the many concerts we attended when we were younger. Rod Stewart, Canned Heat, (we were tear gassed at that one), Led Zeppelin, Grateful Dead, James Taylor, Chuck Berry, Jefferson Airplane, Chambers Brothers, George Harrison, Ringo Star, Paul McCartney; just to name a few. Music is a wonderful way to celebrate life, and trigger wonderful memories that cause the heart to smile.

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Spring in my yard

Spring is coming and so are the small animals and birds. The little girl squirrel I feed does not like the hard corn they put in squirrel food, but the jays really do. I love sitting and watching the birds bathe in my fountain, and the squirrel jump from the fence to the tree scolding my little male mini-Aussie for being in her yard.